B---- + White

I want to see you.

Received that text , unsolicited, from B---- at 8:11 Thursday night.

Can't really wrap my head around it.


So, I'm going out with him tonight.
I cancelled another date to do so, but I was most likely going to cancel that date anyways.
Biding my time right now while waiting to get ready by watching an old black & white Audrey Hepburn movie, in my white robe wearing black + white polka dot underwear. Honestly, I still don't know exactly how I feel about him. We're in such a grey area. Like I've said before, he gives me little to work with, but at the same time I know he likes me. I've begun to miss him, and we've been in more constant contact in the past week, since the 'surges' began. There are no games being played (at least, not on my part. I don't think he is either, I don't get that from him at all). We see eachother about once a week and text most everyday. But never actually talk on the phone.
This is one of the oddest things I have encountered in dating in the tech era, these heavily text-based interactions. Maybe it's a sign of the times, or perhaps it is just part of the word-based world of online dating... Beats me.

It's okay though, because I'm drinking Red Wine while I whine.

I think it will be our 6th date, but I've stopped counting. And we have never talked about what we are doing, or why, we just are. I wasn't kidding when I said he was action-based. I'm trying to just GoWithIt. I mean, he has met Honey and her Honey, and he may meet Goldi tonight. He said something last weekend about "if I got a girlfriend" when we were talkng about his roommate situation, but other than that... nada.

I don't know really what to make of any of it. I'm trying to wrap my head around how I can be confused yet at the same time, completely content with the way things are. Is it a sign of comfort or is it a sign of disconnect? I'm not sure.

I guess the reality is...
Nothing in life is black + white.

Sidenote: I don't know if I ever clarified, but the cancer scare was just that, a scare.