You bring up jeans, I'll remind you to ask for the orirginal hem when you get them tailored. This is very important! You bring up cheese, I tell you about my Roquefort and walnut salad recipe. Its really good.
I may have a little bit of what I like to call a Big Sister Complex. It probably has a lot to do with the fact that I am, surprise! A Big Sister. Could be worse! I could have White Trash Cousin Disorder. (She'd tell you that your lurex glitter scrunchie that matched your sparkle-tip acrylics was like totally hot. [However, if you actually have those two things, I doubt you're reading S+SR]) But with BSC, I want to share, I want to explain, I want people to learn from my foibles, and from my successes.
But to be honest most of what I know, I learned... well, from my Mom, being a Shopgirl since I was 19, & from well... Emily Post. (Okay, and Michael Kors - but only the things about flowers & self tanning).
Know me long enough, and you will in some way or another, hear me say most of the things below. These are my tricks & these are my beliefs - and yes, I'm a Damn Bossy Big Sister. But hey! It's my blog, I can boss all I want! I mean, if you really think about my blog as a whole, it's just one big aesthetically pleasing example of my BSC.
The Big Sister in me wants to tell you*:
* For the record, this is for no one in particular - I was simply ruminating on what the Know It All in me does tell my friends, mom, sisters & clients ad nauseum.
It's a long drive home.
Learn how to take a compliment.
Without following it with something self deprecating.
By simply saying, Thank you.
That no one sounds confident while complaining how fat they are.
Even when you feel really puffy.
Stand up straight.
No, seriously. Stand up straight.
The days you have nothing to wear in your closet are not - I repeat not - the days to go shopping.
You won't find a thing. It's the Shopgirl equivalent to grocery shopping on a full stomach.
Go clothes shopping on a day where you feel skinny, love your outfit & feel good about yourself. Everything will look good, and you'll have a pleasant experience attached to whatever you bought. Halo Effect!
You know, most wines tell you what they're best paired with on the back. Some are as simple as chicken & fish, some are descriptive enough to tell you that they're great paired with Thai.
To give hostess gifts.
Even if it is just a bottle of wine or a $3 bouquet of flowers.
Send thank you notes.
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| Ranunculus (Buttercups) aka My 2nd Favorite Flower |
That Michael Kors was right.
Every woman should know at least 5 flowers.
And no, roses & carnations don't count.
Don't wear things that are ill fitting.
Oversized is one thing... but with poor fit you'll look like you're in Borrowed Clothing.
And if you're borrowing clothing, make sure it fits.
If you feel like you can't walk gracefully in a pair of heels,
you're probably right.
Nothing worse than a girl clomping down the street. We're not Clydesdales.
There is no need to insert yourself in others' drama.
If you don't have something nice (or tactful) to say, don't say anything at all.
This is null and void if you dislike someone's hat.
If you are entering a room or store or Starbucks and you're entering at the same time someone is leaving,
Etiquette calls for the person exiting to go through the door first.
To make room for you, of course.
Polished nails, a single nice accessory, nice shoes & a nice handbag are all you really need.
You could be wearing f21 jeans and a American Apparel tank, but even a well done home manicure, the simplest of gold necklaces, leather shoes & and a leather handbag will make you look like a million bucks.
The only shoes you really need: Nude Peep Toe Heels.
They go with everything. In any season. ICrossMyHeart&HopeToDie.
Its okay to be overdressed.
People will just think you're just coming from somewhere way more exciting.
Selling clothes at a consignment store or Buffalo Exchange?
Call ahead ask what they're buying and what they've over-bought.
& then dress the part. If they think you are chic, the halo effect will take over when they're looking at your cast off clothing.
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| & Bridget Jones' Diary. (Cuz it'z v.g.) |
Every home (or room with a kitchen attached) looks better with fresh flowers.
I prefer a bouquet of the same flower, broken up all over the house.
No need to fuss about with the supermarket schlock mixed bouquets.
It's cheaper anyhow.
Avoid the trap of misery loving company. We all deserve to be surrounded by those who are supportive of us, who care about us. Not to say these people can't call us on our shit sometimes, but I believe in recognizing when someone is a Dragging us Down, Capital D, and saying nothankyou.
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| Flaunt your friends who make you feel fucking fantastic. |
Don't be afraid to know (& flaunt) your best feature.
And to dress accordingly. Choose to focus on the best & not what you're trying to hide.
You know those stretchy elastic headbands?
They make great (near)invisible belts.
Buying wine to impress but on a budget?
Check the groove at the bottom; the deeper the groove the more expensive the bottle itself. The winemakers wouldn't waste an expensive bottle on crap wine.
Avoid wearing gray when you have a hangover.
You'll look like you have a hangover.
Know which friends really have your best interest at heart.
& to how to really listen to them when they give you advice.
Don't kiss your neighbors.
Makes getting the mail really awkward.
Yellow roses are a symbol of friendship.
Just good to know. Ya know?
& lastly...
Dishwashing soap will stop self tanner from staining your hands.
As will a heavy dose of Cetaphil lotion.
So, there you have it. I'm done now. Oh! Though, as your Resident Blogging Big Sister; IAbsolutelyFuckingLoveYou whether you listen to me or not.Okay, now I'm done.
Sidenotes: The Dutchman called me today. We spoke very breifly - but he is so freakin' sweet. He'll be here in two weeks. I vary between pure panic and total excitement. I am also feeling much more centered than I was after the weekend.
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