A Burro List.

A Collective List of Things I Do Too Often:

Cursing people for getting married and/or pregnant on Facebook.
Explaining to people that 'I'm never getting married and/or pregnant'.
Googlestalking.
Thinking my own thoughts in 'Status Update' form.
Painting my nails.
Reading about television shows I just watched on the internet.
Wondering if I am more or less like Zooey Deschanel than I think I am.
Wondering if I am anything like Zooey Deschanel at all.
Complaining that my back hurts.
Wondering what people aren't telling me.

Wondering if the subtle humor in my text messages was noted, or if I just came off as an asshole.
Telling myself not to say certain things outloud.
Saying those things outloud.
Not calling my family.
Being annoyed with my family.
Wondering why my family never calls.
Wondering who the heck is reading this.
Hating the fact that I only own one spoon.
Being too cheap to buy more spoons.
Not going to the beach.
Wondering what I'd look like blonde.
Internalizing song lyrics.
Internalizing novels.
Internalizing.
Projecting.
Thinking 'I should go to the beach' when it's too late in the day for it to be warm at the beach.
Leaving situations thinking the same thing I think after sending a questionably humorous text message.
Feeling like an asshole.
Feeling like an ass.

I either have to work on not feeling this way at all and/or stop feeling like a jerk for thinking this shit in the first place.
OkayYaI'mDone.